Twistchapel Witch Cozy Mystery Box Set: Books 1-4 plus Christmas Short Read online

  “Come on, Allen, that’s enough,” said Warren, coming out of the shadows.

  The vampire doubled over and let loose a wheezing cackle.

  “Allen?” mumbled Bart.

  “Her face!” wheezed the vampire. “She was all like ‘aaa!” and I’m doing all I can to keep a straight face! Oh my goodness…”

  I felt the air around me turn back to normal as I regained full control of my body. I was shaking, but from adrenaline and anger rather than fear.

  “Sorry about that,” said Warren. “He begged me to do that the whole way here. Admittedly, it was pretty funny.”

  “Y-You think it’s funny to keep a girl waiting in the woods by herself, and then have a vampire sneak up behind her?” I said, trying to keep my voice steady.

  The vampire thought about it for a moment as his eyes changed from all black to a pair of normal blue eyes, his fangs detracting as well. Looking him over again, he looked a lot less intimidating, and exactly like regular human. He was tall and skinny, with a slight slouch and nerdy facial features. “Well, if you put it that way… it just sounds kind of mean.”

  “Maybe because it was?” said Bart.

  “Hmm… okay. I’m sorry, Miss Foster,” said the vampire, bowing to me. “I should have seen it from your point of view. I’ll do my best to not do that to you again.”

  “It’s okay,” I sighed. Watching a vampire self-actualize was a strange thing. “Are you Warren’s client?”

  “I am,” he nodded. “My name is Allen.”

  “Allen?” I asked, glancing down at Bart. “That’s not really much of a name for a vampire, is it?”

  “Hey now, no reason to be hurtful,” said Allen, putting a hand over his heart and looking horrified. “I just apologized to you and everything!”

  “I’m sorry,” I said. I wasn’t. “So, are you going to tell me about this murder?”

  “Absolutely. Over a drink, though,” said Allen, abruptly turning and walking away.

  I looked at Bart who shrugged.

  “Follow us,” said Warren, starting to go after Allen. “You didn’t think I had you meet us in a forest for no reason, did you?”

  “To be honest, I kind of did,” I admitted.

  “I suppose that wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibilities,” chuckled Warren.

  After walking for a few minutes, a log cabin appeared. Allen made a beeline for it. It wasn’t very out of the ordinary, as people would build cabins on there property, but this one didn’t have a road leading up to it. Above the door at the front of the cabin was on old, worn out sign. There were no words on it, just a picture of a womanly hand sprinkling variously colored specks down.

  “Welcome to The Faerie’s Dust Tavern,” said Allen, opening the door for me. He gestured in.

  Begrudgingly, I took his offer and walked in. The cabin was much larger than it appeared on the outside, with dozens of wooden tables all across the main room. There was a bar at the back, with several stools bolted into the ground next to it. Nothing about the building itself was very special.

  Aside from the patrons.

  Several vampires gathered a table off to my left, talking quietly amongst themselves. Two large, green creatures that looked like they were made of a mixture of rocks and slime.

  “What are those?” I whispered to Bart.

  “Trolls,” he said. “They’re actually a very friendly race. They just get a bad rap among humans. Probably their natural scent.”

  “Here, this is my usual table,” said Allen, waving us to follow him to a corner table in the back.

  As we sat down, on of the most beautiful women I’d ever seen walked up to our table. Or rather, flew over. The woman had a pair of pink wings, which matched her eye shadow and lipstick. She had large blue eyes that popped out from underneath her blonde bangs.

  “She’s a faerie,” whispered Bart. “They can run the spectrum from being really friendly, to tricksters, to down right nasty.”

  “This is Zoey Foster,” said Allen. “She’s going to help us find out who kill Dante.”

  “Dante, now there’s a name suitable for a vampire,” I said. Bart nodded in agreement.

  “Foster? Like Foster’s Market?” asked the Faerie.

  “Yes, ma’am. That’s my store.”

  “Oh, I shop there all the time!” exclaimed the Faerie. “My name is Elise. Elise Tolbert.”

  I smiled politely but didn’t know what to say. I’m pretty sure someone would have mentioned a winged customer flying over to check out.

  “The Fae can hide their wings, by the way,” whispered Bart, as if he could read my mind.

  “I’ll have the usual,” said Allen.

  “I’ll just a pint of your cheapest draft,” said Warren.

  “Just a water for me,” I said.

  “And you?” asked Elise to Bart.

  “Sorry, I’m so used to not being seen,” laughed Bart. “I’ll take some milk, if you’ve got any.”

  “You got it,” she smiled. “I’ll be right back!”

  “So, tell me about the case,” I said.

  Allen cleared his throat. “A pile of ash was found the other evening near our village. It turned out to be Dante, a popular vampire. We don’t unfortunately know more details, besides the fact that his body turned to ash from being in the sun.”

  I nodded. I didn’t know a lot about vampires, but I knew they didn’t like the sun.

  “Here we are,” said Elise, flying back over with our round of drinks. She set all the drinks down in front of us, and Allen gave her some money. She thanked him and fluttered off to the troll’s table.

  “What’s that?” I asked Allen, who’s drink was dark red.

  “Blood,” he said, looking me in my eyes. “Human blood.”

  I tensed up and looked nervously at Warren. Allen was joking again… right?

  “Oh, calm down,” sighed Warren. “It’s cow blood. Vampire’s haven’t been taking human blood for hundreds of years.”

  “You ruin all the fun,” said Allen to Warren. He looked back to me. “He’s right. To be honest, we probably wouldn’t even like the taste anymore. We’ve grown accustom to having a wide arrange of blood sources, and humans would probably be bottom shelf. No offense.”

  “None taken.”

  “As I was saying, Dante was beloved by everyone,” said Allen taking a long sip on his cow blood cocktail. “He was running for council, and thought to be a sure thing.”

  “Could it be a political assassination?” I asked.

  “Probably not. No one was running against him,” shrugged the vampire.

  “Really?”

  “Like I said, everyone liked him. That’s what makes me think it was probably not another vampire, but you should still do your due diligence. I’ve told the council that you might be coming by to talk to them over the next couple of days.”

  “Who are possible suspects?” I asked.

  “I’m of the mind it is either a werewolf, another vampire or an illegal vampire hunter.”

  “Vampire hunter?”

  “While vampires haven’t attacked humans in centuries, there are still some who hate them,” explained Warren. “Some do it out of some familial duty to their ancestors, some do it because they think all vampires are of the Devil. Whatever the reason, some hunt down vampires illegally to this day.”

  “Are there legal vampire hunters?”

  “Yes,” said Warren. “Normal humans have something similar for there own people, called bounty hunters, I believe. Licensed vampire hunters are allowed to track down vampires that have committed particular crimes.”

  “Do you guys know of any around?” I asked.

  “No,” said Allen. “That’s why we need your help.”

  “Maybe it was an accident?” I offered.

  “Those do happen from time to time,” admitted Allen. “Unfortunately, it can’t be that this time. An angel cried out.”

  “An angel found the body?” I said. “It must b
e paranormal then…” The first time I helped solve a murder, I heard a scream after the victim was killed. I was the first to arrive on the scene, and saw an angel there. Bart later explained that if an angel appears and cries out at the body, that the crime was paranormal.

  “Right,” said Allen slowly, looking at Bart and Warren. “That… That’s why I mentioned it. Is something wrong with her?”

  “I was gonna ask the same thing about you, buddy,” mumbled Bart.

  “So you don’t think it’s a vampire, there’s no illegal vampire hunters around that you know of… so that leaves werewolf?” I asked.

  He nodded. “It’s an old rivalry, but one that’s died down. Some on the council think that the werewolves did it. Would’ve been odd though.”

  “Why odd?” I asked. I assumed werewolves and vampires hated each other. I might have read one or two books on them fighting over young women’s hearts.

  “One of Dante’s big things was bettering relations with werewolves,” said Allen.

  “So… we’ve got several potential leads,” I said. “But you don’t think any of them are right?”

  “Exactly,” smiled Allen, taking another sip of his drink.

  “Allen will be your point of contact for this job,” said Warren. The vampire smiled at me and gave two thumbs up.

  “Seriously?” I said. The vampire lowered his thumbs.

  “I’m actually going to be taking care of something else for the next couple of days,” said Warren, taking a swig from his drink.

  “So, you’re dumping this job on us,” said Bart, lapping up his milk.

  “Hey, I’ll give you guys some money when it’s done,” offered the warlock.

  “No thank you,” I said. “I’m just doing this to help people. I don’t want to be paid.”

  Bart coughed up his milk.

  “You should charge people for your time!” complained Bart. “This is why we can’t have the finer things in life!”

  Chapter 4

  “Focus… focus…” counseled Bart.

  We were sitting in my office the next day, my eyes closed and hands reached out towards Bart. He sat on my desk a few inches away from my fingers while I leaned forward in my chair. I pictured the cat in my head, yelling phrases at him over and over. Hey! I’m over here! Do you hear me?

  “Are you doing it?” asked Bart.

  “Yes!” I said impatiently.

  This had been going on for nearly an hour now to little success. I got the beacon spell to work for a few seconds, but in my excitement I accidentally stopped focusing on him and broke it off.

  “Let’s take a break,” Bart said after a few more minutes. “You’re probably getting more frustrated at it not working, which isn’t going to help any.

  “Okay,” I sighed, leaning back in my chair and opening my eyes. I supposedly didn’t have to keep my eyes closed or point at the person I was trying to target with the spell, but it helped. I think.

  “You’re getting there, Zoey,” said Bart, jumping from the desk to the couch. “It’s impressive you were able to cast it on me at all on your first try. You’ll get it down in no time at all.”

  “We’ll see, I guess,” I said. “What are your thoughts on the vampire death?”

  “My thoughts? You want to know my thoughts now?” he asked. Bart normally didn’t get angry and I was a little taken aback. “You certainly didn’t care about them yesterday.”

  “I’m sorry, Bart, but I was just saving time. We both know I was going to convince you that we should do it eventually.”

  Bart gave me a harsh stare for a few more seconds before letting out a sigh. “You’re probably right.”

  “I usually am,” I joked, giving him a big smile. He didn’t seem amused.

  “Anyway,” continued the cat. “I don’t have too many thoughts on the case. We don’t know any of the people involved, except for the annoying vampire, Allen. We have no leads on a vampire hunter, so we should probably talk to the werewolves or the more important vampires.”

  “I already told Thomas that I’d go bowling with him and Derek tomorrow night, so I might as well wait until then to try and talk to the werewolves. Besides, I don’t really know how to contact Derek. He kind of just… is there… when he wants to be.”

  “That’s true,” nodded Bart. “That leaves the vampires.”

  “Exactly,” I said, grabbing my bag and getting up. “Allen texted me the directions to the leader’s place and said they’d be waiting for me. I’ve never seen someone use so many emojis in a text…”

  “We’re heading to the vampires right now?” asked Bart as he hopped down from the couch.

  “Nope. We’re heading to the police station.”

  “What? Why?”

  “I wanted to talk to Drake before we grabbed dinner tonight. I wanted to clear up the stuff with Warren.”

  “What are you going to say?” said Bart, following me out of the door. “‘Don’t worry, he’s just wanted to hire me to track down who killed a vampire?’”

  “Of course not. You’ll just have to see,” I said, turning around and locked my office door. Truth be told, I hadn’t exactly figured out what I was going to say yet. Obviously there was nothing going on with me and Warren, but he’d probably see the warlock around occasionally, especially if Warren decided to keep giving me jobs. I wasn’t sure if I would take the jobs or not, but that was Future Zoey’s problem.

  I walked by the cash registers, where Bridgette and Charline were both stationed at. Charline had a customer while Bridgette was free. Perfect.

  “Hey Bridgette, how are you feeling?” I said, walking into her lane and keeping a wide berth from Charline. The last thing I wanted was to get caught by Charline on my way out.

  “Hi Zoey!” smiled Bridgette. “I’m doing great, thanks for asking. I’ve been handling the morning sickness pretty well so far.”

  “Happy to hear that,” I said. “I’m sorry we haven’t gotten much of a chance to talk since you first announced you were pregnant. I’ve been a horrible friend.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” said Bridgette. “I’m sure you’re busy. Actually, word around the store is that you’ve been very busy.” She raised her eyebrows at me.

  “I know, I know,” I said, shaking my head. “I’ve been so caught up in all this sleuthing, so I’ve been having to leave all the time. That’s why I promoted Eric and-”

  “No, not the sleuthing about,” she said, glancing back at Charline and then leaning forward. “I’ve heard you’ve been seeing Drake and another guy!”

  “That’s not exactly-” I tried.

  “I didn’t know you liked guys with ponytails!” she whispered.

  “Hahahah!” laughed Bart, grabbing his stomach and rolling on the ground beside me.

  This was not going how I expected it to. This wasn’t exactly the best time to explain what was going on.

  “Why don’t you come over Saturday night?” I offered. “We can make it a girl’s night. Just the two of us. We’ll be able to really catch up and fill each other in on our lives.”

  “Saturday night?” she asked, thinking it over. “Dan was going to take me out but… sure! We haven’t hung out in months!”

  “Perfect,” I smiled. “Let’s shoot for around 9 pm?”

  Bridgette nodded. I glanced over her shoulder to see Charline finishing up with the customer. She looked up and made eye contact with me.

  Oh no. She saw me.

  It was now or never.

  “Bridgette, Charline knows I’m here,” I whispered. “I’ve got to escape.”

  “I totally understand,” she winked. “Get out while you still can.”

  “You’re the best,” I smiled, walking backwards. “See you Saturday night if not before!”

  I took off briskly, not looking back until I made it to the parking lot. Even if Charline needed something, Eric could probably help her with it. I sometimes felt bad for promoting that kid.

  “Good job getting o
ut of there,” said Bart, jumping through my car door before I could open it.

  “Thanks,” I said as I got in. “I thought for sure Charline would get me once she saw me.”

  “You know it’s probably not healthy to be so scared of talking to your employees,” said Bart.

  “I’m not scared of my employees,” I said, starting the car and backing out. “Just the one employee.”

  We drove through the middle of town for a minute before I saw the police station. I could’ve just walked, but I guess I hadn’t thought of that in my rush to leave the store. After talking with Drake, I could head over to the vampires and try to hear their side of the story. Maybe they’d have some good insight.

  I pulled up to the police station and got out of my car. Probably no point in locking it. Who would steal from a car in front of the cops?

  Walking inside, I passed by the waiting room and walked up to the policeman working the front desk. He was the same officer I had seen every time I’ve come in so far, who had not once looked up at me. He was always so focused on whatever was on his screen.

  It was now my goal to get him to look at me.

  “Hey there, buddy,” I said, trying to spice things up. “How are you doing this fine day?”

  “Hello, Miss,” he said, not looking up from the screen. “How can we help you today?”

  My shoulders sank a bit, but I wasn’t going to give up so easily.

  “Just like last time, I’m here to see Detective Drake,” I smiled, putting my hands on the counter.

  The policeman continued typing, not acknowledging that he heard me.

  “We, uh… we have dinner plans tonight,” I said. Surely this was peaking his interest. Surely.

  “He’s not in right now, Miss,” he said absently, still not looking up.

  “Really? Where is he?” I asked.

  “On a call,” he said, typing away. “You can feel free to stay in the waiting room. I can let him know someone is waiting for him when he comes back.”

  “Well, not just someone,” I smiled, leaning on the counter. “You know, his hot date for tonight.”

  “Okay,” he said, continuing to type. “I’ll tell him his hot date is waiting for him.”

  “Wait…” I said, taking a step back. I just wanted this guy to look up! I didn’t want Drake thinking I came in saying I was hot! He’d think I was a conceited or something. “I-I don’t want you to actually say that to him.”